Imagine that it’s your wedding day. Imagine walking in, just freshly eighteen. Imagine looking around and seeing everyone celebrating and having fun. All of a sudden, it hits you. You don’t know who you are marrying. You don’t know what they look like or who they even are as a person.  That’s the reality of many people that are involved in arranged marriages. In many situations, the bride and groom do not meet until the day of their wedding. An arranged marriage is when two people are set up by outside parties, usually by the families, but in some cultures: a matchmaker. Most of the time, the people involved are the ones who know the least because it’s not about them, it is about the families and their wishes (Tahir).

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Although they are not traditional in the United States, arranged marriages have occurred throughout history and in many different cultures. In Roman cultures, the family of the bride would offer a dowry (money or goods that the bride brings to her husband) and if it was enough then the husband’s family would take it. In this case, the husband would typically get a say in whether or not he wants to marry the bride. However, the Roman cultures have been known to give women more rights than other cultures (Westbrook). On the other hand, in Asian cultures, the bride is a pawn in a much bigger game. In traditional Indian arranged marriages the bride often doesn’t even meet the guy she is about to marry. In the article “Arranged Marriage in India Is Modernizing ... but Perhaps Not Fast Enough,” Manvenna Suri explains “Families would write up a resume of their children’s vital statistics – weight, height, complexion, and caste – and share the list with the parents of prospective partners.” The main relationship that is being built is between the families, not the couple.

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Arranged marriages typically happen because of economic reasons. This then creates a partnership more than a marriage. Most lower-class families try to marry their daughters into a higher class because they get benefits. They get money and a boost in support,  security, and social status. The emotions and feelings of the bride aren’t considered. Another element of arranged marriages is that there tends to be no love or romance. Danielle Page writes in her article “Why You Should Treat Your Marriage More Like A Business” “Those who have an arranged marriage often have a practical old fashioned marriage that is likened to a to-do list, but the connection is missing.” The concept of falling in love naturally isn’t valued.

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But what is the hardest part of being in an arranged marriage? Arguably, it is keeping it afloat. The couples are married to someone who they barely know and have to meet the expectations that come from the families. Divorce is, oftentimes, not an option. As a bride, you have to honor your family name and respect your new family's wishes. There is also a comparison between arranged marriages and autonomous marriages. An autonomous marriage is another word for a love marriage. The standard that is set by others is unattainable because comparing arranged marriages to love marriages isn’t fair. In her article “Understanding Arranged Marriage: An Unbiased Analysis of a Traditional Marital Institution,” Naema Tahir asserts, “The autonomous marriage sets the standards of an ideal marriage all marriages must aim for, including the arranged marriage. The arranged marriage is then measured by characteristics typical of the autonomous marriage system.” 

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Arranged marriages have withstood history and created a standard of living. Even though arranged marriages are an anomaly for you, they are an everyday occurrence for millions of people around the world.